Farm Mom Burnout Is Real: Crying on the Kitchen Floor

When It All Feels Like Too Much

I sat on my dirty kitchen floor and cried…..more than once, to be honest. But the time that is burned into my brain – the one that still feels like it just happened yesterday was November 2, 2011.

The kids were 15, 12, and 9. They were three active, beautiful, loud humans—and a husband of 19 years that I was blessed to have, but who also made me feel like I was drowning some days.

The Heavy Load Farm Moms Carry Every Day

On that particular morning, I had been out to feed the cattle in my pajamas. Not the cute matching kind, either. The pajama pants had holes in places I’d rather not admit, and the shirt was a worn-out free seed company shirt that was at least five years old.
I was wearing a dirty Carhartt jacket that wasn’t even mine and rubber boots that also weren’t mine.

Apparently, nothing clean or sized appropriately for my body was available.
The jacket was too big, and the boots were too small—or too small and too big. I can’t remember, honestly. I just remember none of it feeling right and all of it smelling like cattle, hogs, and desperation.

A Morning That Felt Like Drowning

I remember feeding the cows, the freshly weaned calves, and then six calves that were the kids’ show calves.
Those six sweet things were headed to Hoosier Beef Congress in less than a month, and not one of them was truly broke to lead. Not. One.

They had about as much training as a toddler with a sugar high! Somehow, once again, we were down to the wire.

We were smack-dab in the middle of harvest, which meant any minute I would be getting the call to get the grain cart to the field.
The laundry was approximately three feet deep on the laundry room floor, though that was probably a conservative estimate. We had officially reached the part of the season where clean socks were a luxury, clean underwear was a lucky find, and the kitchen – well, we won’t go there.

That’s when I realized I was slumped down on my sticky kitchen floor. Drinking flat Dr Pepper out of a measuring cup, clutching a bag of Chips Ahoy cookies like they were the only thing keeping me afloat.

And I cried. Big, ugly, snotty, soul-draining tears.

When Farming, Motherhood, and Exhaustion Collide

I cried for the chaos.
I cried from exhaustion.
I cried because most likely I had yelled at my kids before they got on the bus about the show calves.
I cried because I wasn’t 100% sure the measuring cup I was drinking out of was clean.

And for the life of me, I don’t remember the exact thing that broke me that morning – the single thing that had sent my whole house of emotional cards tumbling.
But I absolutely remember what got me off the floor.

A Reminder at Just the Right Time

It was a newspaper clipping my mom had mailed me – yes, snail-mailed me. It had arrived the day before. I had opened it quickly and put it aside. Aside, as in right there withing arm’s reach of my spot on the floor. Right there among the dirty dishes, take-out trash, and old mail. It was right there withing reach, like God knew exactly where it needed to be.

It was a simple clipping from a farm newspaper, with a Post-it note in my Mom’s handwriting that said, “I thought you might need this.”

How do moms do that?

The article was titled “Never Forget All You Really Do for Everyone on a Farm” by Melissa Hart. And in the middle of my ugly cry, with cookie crumbs all over me and drinking my stale soda, I read these words:

“Never forget how much you do.”

And just like that…I exhaled.

These words are etched in my brain now. The article is somewhere in this house – I couldn’t find it if I tried – but I’ll never forget it.

I wrote those six simple words on a Post-It note that’s still hanging inside the cabinet door – the one that holds the Chips Ahoy emergency breakdown cookies.

Farm Mom Burnout Is Real

“Never Forget How Much You Do”

It’s the sentence that holds me together when I’m unraveling. Because sometimes, I still find myself on my dirty kitchen floor in tears.

It doesn’t matter what you do – if you’re human, life can get overwhelming. Especially when you’re the one everyone turns to. The one holding the proverbial list of all the things no on else remembers.

Somewhere along the way, without applying for the job or being handed a title, you became the one holding it all together.

The Mental Load of Farm Moms Is A Heavy One

The Chaos Coordinator who’s on duty 24/7.

And even when it feels like the plates you’ve got spinning are crashing to the floor around you and everyone is staring – let me gently remind you: they’re not.

What you’re doing matters.
Even when it’s a mess, even when no one sees it but you.

👉🏻 If you’ve ever had a moment like this, you’re not alone. I’d love for you to share this someone who might need a reminder today: “Never forget how much you do.”